Posted on November 10th, 2009 — in Information Parlor
As in all daily interactions, it is important to remember you will converse with people from various background and life experiences. Speaking and listening effectively are crucial to creating an atmosphere of respect with others. Showing respect to everyone, and encouraging open communication can help bring you a motivated and congenial staff while impressing your colleagues.
Improved communications + better results
= more success
Three important communication techniques:
- Create safety in the conversation by encouraging others to participate and express their concerns and objectives.
- Establish mutual purpose by understanding what the others view point might be and paraphrase back to establish clarity in the conversation.
- Communicate with respect by actively listening to the other person. Give total attention to the conversation and encourage participation.
Building rapport
My 22 years experience in business management has taught me that building rapport and respect for people with different personalities and different viewpoints is imperative.
A main objective is to develop positive communication style by building the rapport with others. This is a large part of getting the ideas across in a constructive, collaborative manner with mutual respect.
10 ways to maximize communication results
- Deliver clear and consistent messages in your conversations
- Manage communication problems with knowledge and awareness of conflict management
- Work on you first. Don’t try to change the other person.
- Handle all conversations with respect and you will receive respect in return
- Stay within your boundaries and values, and keep emotionally balanced during conflicts
- Inspire, energize and motivate others
- Actively listen.
- Never make the other person wrong
- During a conflict, find mutual ground, then resolve the issue with that in mind
- Don’t be a victim or play the villain in a conflicting situation
The concept of communicating best when it matters most is intended to ultimately guide a greater appreciation and respect for others, while maximizing the outcome of conversation.
Communication and leadership are inseparable.
Our ability to energize, inspire, and motivate people to high levels of performance is directly related to our ability to communicate well. Be ready with your conflict resolution skills at any time. By communicating with empathy, yet with strength and diplomacy, you will model effective communication to all around you, and the results will happily affect the bottom line.
About conflict:
- Conflict is inevitable
- Conflict develops because we are dealing with people’s lives, jobs children, pride, self-concept, ego and sense of mission or purpose
- Early indicators of conflict can be recognized
- There are strategies for resolution that are available and DO work
- Although inevitable, conflict can be minimized, diverted and/or resolved
Conflict Indicators:
- Poor and disrespectful communication
- Individual seeking power
- Dissatisfaction with management style
- Weak leadership
- Lack of openness
- Change in leadership
- Certain body language
- Disagreements regardless of issue
- Withholding bad news
- Surprises
- Strong public statements
- Airing disagreements through media
- Conflicts in value system
- Increasing lack of respect
- Lack of candor on budget problems or other sensitive issues
- Lack of clear goals
- No discussion of progress, failure relative to goals, failure to evaluate the superintendent fairly, thoroughly or at all
When you are not aware of what the other person’s needs or if you are not listening carefully to the message the other is stating, conflict occurs. This unconscious behavior is what stops you from maximizing the results in conversations. When a person actively works at these different communication habits and skills, better results and less stress occurs in the conversation process.
Conflict is destructive when it:
- Takes attention away from other important activities
- Undermines morale or self-concept
- Polarizes people and groups, reducing cooperation
- Increases or sharpens difference
- Leads to irresponsible and harmful behavior, such as fighting, name-calling
Conflict is constructive when it:
- Results in clarification of important problems and issues
- Results in solutions to problems
- Involves people in resolving issues important to them
- Encourages authentic communication
- Helps release emotion, anxiety, and stress
- Builds cooperation by people joining to resolve conflict
- Helps individuals develop understanding and skills
Techniques for avoiding and/or resolving conflict:
- Meet conflict head on
- Set goals
- Plan ahead and communicate frequently
- Be honest about concerns
- Agree to disagree; understand healthy disagreement builds better decisions
- Get individual ego out of management style
- Let your team create; people will support what they help create
- Openly discuss differences in values
- Continually stress the importance of following policy
- Communicate honestly; avoid playing “gotcha”-type games
- Provide more data and information than is needed
- Develop a sound management system
Contagious decision controversies:
The controversies usually involve:
- Changes in the way “we’ve always done things”
- Notions of fundamental values
- Determined, articulate advocates for every side
- Inability to compromise
- Rampant rumors
- Board election
Resolving Conflict:
Searching for the causes of conflict is essential to be successful in resolving the conflict.
Eight possible causes of conflict include:
- Conflict with self
- Needs or wants not being met
- Values being tested
- Perceptions being questioned
- Assumptions being made
- Having minimal knowledge
- Expectations are too high/too low
- Personality, race, or gender differences are present
Active listening
Acknowledge the feelings and view point of the other person. Compassionately allow people to feel whatever they feel and discuss their concern. This sets the example for others to hear & accept your feelings also. As you actively listen, give respect to the other person as they express their idea. This results in a better outcome for the conversation. Ask more “open-ended” and creative questions: “How did you like that movie?” is an open-ended question that invites a wide range of answers. “Did you like it?” suggests only “yes” or “no” answers and does not encourage discussion.
Exercise:
- Listen more carefully and more responsively
- Explain your intent to others and openly invite their opinions
- Make an effort to express yourself more clearly and completely
- Transfer your criticisms and complaints into requests and positive statements and use appropriate language to communicate them.
- Avoid arguing over individual ranking or position. Present a position as logically as possible.
- Avoid “win/lose” statements. Discard the notion that someone must win
- Avoid changing your mind in order to avoid conflict and achieve harmony (people pleasing)
- Avoid majority voting, averaging, bargaining, or coin flipping. These actions do not lead to consensus
- Keep the attitude that holding different views is both natural and healthy to a group
- View initial agreement as suspect. Explore the reasons underlying apparent agreement and make sure that members have willingly agreed
2004 © Cheryl Vallejos, Prime Leaders Community
Reprinting These Articles
You are welcome to use one of these articles. Just be sure and include the “author’s box” below:
Cheryl Vallejos
Prime Leaders Community
www.PrimeLeaders.com
Heping good managers become great leaders!
President and CEO of Endorse Success, LLC and Prime Leaders Community, Cheryl Vallejos has more than 22 years of experience in organizational business management. Her passion is helping small businesses create big profits. Cheryl’s business and personal clients include those wanting career advancement, people starting or expanding their businesses, and those needing guidance and support in setting, meeting, and exceeding their business and personal goals.
A dynamic and impressive leading-edge coach and consultant, Cheryl has combined extensive business management experience with her highly regarded talent as a certified coach to helping entrepreneurs and businesses improve productivity, cut costs by over 25% and find that elusive extra time in the day for family and friends.
Cheryl recently launched Prime Leaders Community, an excellent business resource that provides networking, leadership coaching and training, tele-seminars and much more. She has successfully started, owned and operated 3 businesses, and is the author of four books: Injecting The Juice Into Leadership
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Posted on July 21st, 2009 — in House Of Hardware, Information Parlor, The Healthy Way
Been traveling a lot lately. Here are the sites I found most useful lately! And wanted to share these good websites with you. Are you looking for home security or some extra energy?
The Right Tent
We went on a family camp trip a few days ago. The weather was supposed to be nice but you’re supposed to prepare for the worst. Shopping before a camping trip is fun - especially online. We found a good camping tent. We weren’t too rushed but we still wanted our tent shipped to our house on time. At first I thought I had the wrong camping tent, then we assembled it and it was good. Hurry up on the shippping. Camping in the country was awesome. Fresh air, awesome scenery. I want to do it again soon!
Security System
In planning for a week long camping trip, I thought it would be a good time now to get a security system for the house. I’d say that we have a lot of what we think is valuable in our house now. Theft does crazy things to your head I think. You feel so violated. After searching through websites for a while, we landed on a very informative place and chose to get a security system. It only took four hours to get it in.
eFusjon Opportunity
Energy is required in large amounts for hiking, cooking, living in the wild. We had been efusjon members for a short time and are already happy to be part of the efusjon opportunity. The added energy is definitely something we were grateful for with all of the crazy camping activities we did. Energy is something I take seriously so the ‘a’ team at efusjon is awesome. We bought in for the drink and you should too. It’s worth every penny. Start making money now - get in today.
See you later dinosaur. Check out the links!
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Posted on May 8th, 2009 — in Information Parlor, Savvy Product Infos, The Virtual Lifestyle
Using table linens for a party or special occasion will give it quite a finishing touch. Table linens include not only table cloths but table napkins, placemats, chair coverings and/or table skirting. Table linens set the spirit of any gathering, whether it be formal or casual. When you host a dinner party or special function, the linens you choose actually are the best way to let your invitees know what type of mood the dining should be, possibly even more so than the food you serve. Due to this, you want to make sure you select the best table linens for the event.
When planning to keep your dining casual, consider choosing table linens made of 100% basic polyester fabric. It is important you be able to easily launder the linens since you will probably be using them once again. This is what makes 100% basic polyester fabric a great choice. Simple to take care of and soil resistant, this permanent pressed material will keep its color and not shrink. Linens that need unique handling, such as dry cleaning, are not the best pick for casual dining. You do not want your guests to believe they must use extra precaution due to the fact that they are concerned they may destroy your linens during a casual dinner.
If you are having a formal dinner party or special occasion, the best table linens to use are the luxurious fabrics such as satin, pintuck, crinkle or sparkle organza. Each of these fabrics can be found in many different colors making it easy to match them to your current décor. If this is more of a “one time event” happening away from the home, consider linens like tissue lame, iridescent crush, polystipe or matte satin which you can rent. The use of any combination of tablecloths, table napkins, placemats, chair covers and/or table skirting is a simple way to make your guests feel special and welcome.
It is easy to determine the mood of your special occasion based on the fabrics and patterns of the table linens you choose. In truth, today’s host/hostess is actually only limited by his/her resourcefulness. Do not let your party preparation and hard work appear incomplete because you neglected to invest in linens that match the theme of your occasion.
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Posted on April 21st, 2009 — in Information Parlor
Acquiring and placing estates on a public sale is trouble-free and profitable for equally sellers and buyers. Discover a public sale it is not an easy course. Particulars regarding the home offered on an auction can be found in the local or national press, or on the web. Local estate agents over and over again have details of properties to sale by auction too. Nonetheless a method of discovering public sale is to write down the contact numbers of any “For Sale by Auction” signboards.
There’s often a fee to be on the auctioneers mailing list and for receiving a directory complete of images and information about the properties. Free catalogues are regularly of no use.
You’ve just got a few weeks to know what’s available on by sale, so action is required as soon as possible. However if you are looking to buy property overseas, find superb property for sale in Malta online, try sites that deal directly with local agencies and owners.
The variety of home largely auctioned are the one-offs that agents finds tricky to assess or to put up for sale, but that hold improvement promises.
Auctions are also fascinating for the repossession homes offered for sale by mortgage lenders, which typically are bargain and hold little reserve prices. Before the public auction visit and hold a good look at the asset. Explore the vicinity and, very useful, coordinate with your legal representative to fulfil the basic investigation and searches - like an official inspection and a professional evaluation.
It’s clever to put your funds, and more significant, set up the money to pay in advance a deposit, in general 10 percent on the public sale day, and the remaining 90 percent in the next 28 days after the auction. If your bid is triumphant, you have to set down the ten per cent to the auctioneer as soon as possible and the seller’s counterpart has to underwrite the Memorandum of Agreement. Penalties for disappointment to protect the approved figure are strict.
Memorize that if you lose the bid you will throw away grand part of the cash you have wasted on the survey plus the legal fees, but it is a good idea informing the mediator of the cost you are prepared to spend for a specific property that has been withdrawn; you never know, in particular cases the vendor may be enthusiastic to consider your bid.
The public sale pact is corresponding to exchange of agreements in the usual sale by not public contract. Which also means that the purchaser can’t be rejected by higher offers and the seller does not have to be worried of last-minute cost renegotiations.
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Posted on March 9th, 2009 — in Information Parlor
Moving announcements are a great way to let those around you know you’ve relocated. As we all know, moving can be quite the chore and is often a stressful ordeal. One way to help organize the process is to make a checklist for those you would want to announce your move to. The list should include:
* Your local Post Office
* Magazines Companies
* Your Local Newspaper Delivery Service
* Home Security Companies
* Any Member Associations
* Your Workplace
* Your Child’s School
* Your Bank
* Applicable Utility Companies
There are several options you can choose from to announce your move. One way to let your friends and family know you have moved is to pick up a Change of Address packet at the local USPS. All you have to do is ask the clerk at the counter for the information packet or just look around on the counters at the Post Office because often times, the kits are displayed there for public convenience. You can also visit the United States Post Office online at www.USPS.com. The USPS website is very user friendly. Simply click on the Change of Address option in the ‘Receiving Your Mail’ category and fill out the electronic form. You can let the Post Office know the date of your move and even set up a period of time for your mail to be forwarded after you’ve relocated. It’s an easy, convenient way to assist in the process of sending announcements about your move less stressful.
Another way to go is with personalized, printed announcements. So many of us are now creating our own greeting cards at home with our computers and printers. Many digital cameras come equipped with software programs to do just that so why not design a moving announcement for your friends and family? Purchase some nicely colored card stock or use your existing copy paper to create a fun and personalized message to announce your move. You can add a digital photo of your new home to the front of the announcement or create your own idea. It’s a fun way to let everyone know that you’re relocating and you can even get the kids involved on this project!
If you don’t have the time or energy to make your own moving announcements, you can always opt for an online or local printing service in your area. One economical online resource for this type of service is vistaprint.com. You simply choose your design preference, fill out the appropriate information on the website and the announcements will be delivered right to your door. Just make sure you allow enough time for delivery if you decide to go this route.
moving announcements Find out all kinds of great articles and additional resources to help you with your next move.
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Posted on February 25th, 2009 — in Information Parlor
The British Prime Minister has unveiled the final rescue project to reinforce the stability of the banking system, to raise confidence. The plan contains a cover to help banks from potential new a new financial collapse. The UK banks have to pay for the insurance, in cash. However all this presages the daily cost of life will plunge, deflation encourages saving even if this might slow down Great Britain’s financial situation. Exchange rates can fluctuate - stay ahead of the game with Foreign Currency Direct.
House market kept to collapse drastically last year, with the country’s most large mortgage lender, Halifax, announcing, a sixteen % annual decline in during two thousand and eight. Market prices have already fallen 20 percent from their 2007 peak and more declines are to be expected as approvals for home mortgages are at its lowest record, as reported by data.
The number of unemployment increased past 1 million in at the end of 2008, climbing very fast since the early 90s. The economic crisis has led to thousands of job cuts in different markets, and forecasts of 3m unemployed by the end of year two thousand and ten. Several high street stores went out of business in the last weeks. Shops have also been cutting prices to pay the total amount of debts.
The financial policy decisions of the British government are based on recovering the financial system and do nothing for the pound. As a consequence the pound is most likely keep to lose value. Markets will witness the pound fluctuate up and down but forecasts for the GB pound is not that good.
Rumours amongst analysts showed an 80% chance the CBE will reduce borrowing costs to 1.25 % from two percent, putting the bank interest rate to its lowest since founded.
This means a lower return for the city investors who then move their funds from Sterling to a currency with a higher return, because of the decline of the pound.
Policymakers have announced the bank will have to cut bank rates to nearly zero and opt the last resort, essentially producing more money to encourage the financial situation. This appears to tie in nicely with the government plan of trying their way out of the recession problem, not exactly what most European countries decisions, hence a possible explanation for the big decline in Pound against to the and US Dollar.
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Posted on January 30th, 2009 — in Information Parlor
In Steven Covey’s excellent book, “The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People” he tells a well-worn story about the use of time.
In the story, some professor guy (I think) stands at the front of a class, with a big jar. In the jar, first of all he puts some big rocks, and asks the class, “Is it full now”.
Mostly they say, “Yes”.
Then he gets some smaller rocks and these fit in quite nicely too, just between the big rocks. Again, he asks the same question, “Is it full now?”
The group, a little more suspicious say, “Yes”, because it seems to be.
He then gets out a bag of sand and surprise, surprise, those tiny grains of sand squeeze down beside the smaller rocks, filling up the tinier spaces. “Full?”, he asks.
“Sure”, say the increasingly dubious bunch of students in the audience.
Finally, trump card is the water, smaller than sand, of course and finally, as we aren’t getting too sub-molecular about it, the jar is full.
Impressive huh?
The professor then asks,
“What’s the moral of the story?”
Of course the class, thinking they’ve spotted the trick here, say,
“You can always squeeze a bit more in”
A standard and pretty smart reply. The professor, however, is a step a head (all that professorism does it, of course!).
“The moral of the story is that you need to get your big rocks in first, or all that other ’stuff’ gets in, way too soon and takes up all the space.”
Cool story?
The point of course, relates to managing your time.
What are your ‘big rock’ things?
Well, for sure it isn’t all the little jobs you do. All the fire-fighting (or it may be in the short-term, but that is another day).
The trick is to create spaces, ring-fenced, as they say, to do the good stuff.
In business, this is a list something like this:-
1. Planning for the future 2. Time with your people - good, focused one-on-one time preferably 3. Coaching your people in their work 4. Developing others around you 5. Delegating constructively 6. Creating Succession Plans 7. Building relationships 8. Developing new business opportunities 9. Fixing problems once and for all 10. Making time for a life outside the business
There are more!
Covey and his big rocks eh?
He calls them Quadrant Two activities. If you don’t spend time putting these first into your schedule, truth is, you will never fit them in and things will never evolve and grow.
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Posted on January 2nd, 2009 — in Information Parlor
If you feel like you don’t know how to talk to people of the opposite sex, you might be onto something!
Men and women definitely have different ways of communicating. Learning how the other half uses language will help to improve your communication with the opposite sex.
And if you’re still not convinced, there is even a term that is specific to the different languages of the sexes. The term is genderlect. Suzette Haden Elgin coined the term in her book, Genderspeak. Her book talked about different methods men and women could use to better communicate.
Deborah Tannen went into even more detail about gender communication in her book, entitled You Just Don’t Understand: Men and Women in Conversation (1990, Ballantine.) Tannen says that even when a man and woman are raised in the same neighbourhood or even in the same home they will grow up in different language worlds.
The question of how to talk to people of the opposite sex really needs to first be answered by understanding the ways men and women differ in how they express themselves.
Here are some of the biggest differences, starting at a very young age:
1. Girls talk or use language as a way to be liked. Little boys often talk to be boastful.
2. A little girl will request something. A boy? He makes demands.
3. Girls tend to use language as a way to create harmony - to get closer to someone. If you guessed that young boys keep conflicts going by talking, you are right!
4. Girls talk using words and will use more words to explain something. A young boy is more likely to use actions to emphasize what he is trying to say.
As we grow and learn how to talk to people, being aware of these differences can help (especially when the people you are talking to are of the opposite sex.)
Many of those early traits continue, as we grow older. Men will continue to use communication as a means of staying independent, while women will continue to use language as a tool for intimacy.
Grown-up men often will talk to establish status (remember the boasting as little boys?) Women will connect themselves to others by using language to build up rapport.
Tannen calls these differences ‘report-talk’ (men) and ‘rapport-talk’, for the women. Understanding this one specific difference can really show how women quite often take what men say, personally, when they really were only ‘reporting’ on a situation.
Learning how to talk to people is made a lot simpler when you understand genderlect - the language of the sexes.
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Posted on January 2nd, 2009 — in Information Parlor
The call center represents your first line of communication with customers and potential customers. Whether you choose to outsource this service or to establish an in-company call center, this is one area in which quality is paramount and cannot be compromised. Clients’ questions and concerns need to be dealt with courteously and effectively, and sales calls require careful handling - as some members of the public have grown wary of unsolicited calls due to the sheer bulk of such calls that they receive, it is imperative that these interactions are the very embodiment of tact, timing and effective communication. This is a tall order, but increasingly, there is software available that is tailor made to fill it.
Of course, the key to an first-rate call center has always been, and remains, effective human communication. That having been said, though, there are also many problems that can be solved by technology. In many cases, the right software can increase the efficiency of your call center so that many repetitive tasks are streamlined or even eliminated. Outgoing calls can be made much more efficiently, so that callers spend most of their time in actual communication with clients and potential clients on the other end of the line. The real value of any call center lies in the personalities and communication skills of the personnel; technology helps us display and utilize these assets. For example, software programs that allow us to use predictive or automated dialing free the caller from this repetitive and time consuming task. Call center software can set up voice messaging for direct marketing, leaving automated messages on voice mail and answering machines that are reached by this method. When a live voice answers, the call is transferred automatically to an agent. Think of the time this can save - call center employees are called into action only when they are needed. Studies show that there is little difference in customer response to an automated answering machine message as opposed to a live one, as long as the automated message is clear, concise and informative. Of course, in live communication, the human quality of the call makes all the difference. Call center software organizes things so that human ability is not wasted, but used to full capacity, without putting undue stress on the employee.
Speaking of employee stress - who in this day and age is not acquainted with the benefits of telecommuting or working from home? Many studies show that employees who work from home are often happier, more efficient, and show a greatly decreased rate of absenteeism. For the employer, too, this makes sense. Because modern technology makes it possible for us to maintain close and effective communication with employees who are working from home, this arrangement is often a win-win situation - greater satisfaction and decreased overhead costs. New call center software makes it possible for some call center employees to experience the benefits of working from home. In fact, in the near future, the virtual call center may become the norm - employees, equipped with the right hardware and software, will both make and answer calls from a home office, while staying in full communication with their co-workers and supervisors. Communication software will facilitate instant system-wide messaging, employees will be supported by software that enables and facilitates telemarketing, routing, predictive dialing, automatic dialing, and automatic messaging. At the same time, they will be able to stay close to their families, avoiding a costly and time-consuming commute.
The potential of call center software has barely begun to be tapped. In time, this software may allow the call center to move far beyond its present role as a sender and receiver of business related communication. To cite just one example, in this time of political uncertainty, quick and efficient lines or communication throughout a community are more important than ever. Call center software could, in an emergency, be called into service: picture an emergency alert system capable of reaching tens of thousands of households almost instantly. Far from being an alienating force, communication software has the potential to connect our growing communities in ways we might never have dreamed of. Innovative use of this technology will be both a challenge and a highly satisfying adventure.
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Posted on November 27th, 2008 — in Information Parlor
Choosing a mobile phone and mobile phone plan may be a confusing task. After you have bought your mobile phone with the required features,design and look, you need to choose the company that will provide your mobile phone service. Then you need to decide on what mobile plan is most cost-effective. Consider on your usage, the value of the services the plan provides, before deciding which plan would work out most effectively for you.
If you are looking forward to lower your mobile phone bill, ‘pay as you go is the way to go. You can start off with figuring out what you need from your mobile phone.Most pay as you go plans offer caller ID, voice mail, and call waiting at no extra charge but vary widely on long distance. Next, think about how many minutes do you really use. Minutes expire in anywhere from 30 to 90 days, depending on the service provider.After that you can renew them online or from any store. Although pay as you go plans include long distance, you’ll pay more by the minute and could run into restrictions, particularly if you travel.Keep yourself informed about the network’s coverage area before you sign.With pay as you go phones, you’ll always know how many minutes are left on your cell phone because after every call you make, your balance comes right on the screen. You will remain in control of your costs , there are no contracts, no bills and above all no worries. Instead, you will purchase credit for your phone and this credit runs down as you make calls or use any services.
So if you’re tired of being locked into service agreements and monthly plans, pay as you go phones are the best option. You can always “top up” your account yourself anytime by simply purchasing the topup. You may get promotional offers like free weekends, free evenings,etc. Pay as you go plans are most common with teenagers use their mobile phones minimally. These plans keep you away from suprising monthly bills.More and more people are saving money from it and finding out that they can take advantage of this convenience. Once you are sure that this plan is a good fit for your communication needs, you can renew it.
It is probably wise to first think about your particular needs and then research the offers other plans are giving before deciding which plan is best for you.
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